Please note: This is a stickied sponsored post.
“Last week, we were all saddened and shocked to hear that a young father of 2, R’ Naftali Rhodes A’H, was tragically killed while crossing an intersection in Far Rockaway.
We cannot heal the family’s enormous pain, but we can help to ensure that they have the financial security to move on with dignity.
We ask you to open your hearts and help in any way can by visiting https://www.rayze.it/raisefornaftali/
May your generosity and kindness help bring Besuros Tovos. Thank you.”
All donations are tax deductible and can be made securely here. 100% of the proceeds will be going directly to the family.
JJ’s Note: I was in yeshiva with Naftali and he was always learning or helping a younger student with something they were learning. He was one of the most aidel and kindhearted people out there. This was truly shocking and a terrible tragedy. May his family find comfort, and if you can help with a donation it will go a long way to help them though this impossibly hard time.
Leave a Reply
33 Comments On "Please Help A Widow And Her Two Children In The Horrible Aftermath Of Their Father’s Death Last Week"
All opinions expressed below are user generated and the opinions aren’t provided, reviewed or endorsed by any advertiser or DansDeals.
What a zchus
Bd’e. Thank you for sharing this on this forum.
I saw this story last week on Yeshiva World News and it was devastatingly shocking and heartbreaking. It really hit home because I spent several years learning down the block from the scene at Shor Yoshuv years ago. As much as I wish the family only simchas and absolutely no more tragedies, I will not be donating unless I can get confirmation if Naftali had life insurance (no intended sarcasm or ridicule). My grandfather spent 35+ years working as a life insurance agent for the same company. The advice he gave me and his 17 grandchildren (especially the boys) before going under the chupah is about responsibility of taking care of a wife and kids, ESPECIALLY after G-D forbid potential tragedy strikes. He of course was referring to life insurance, and even if it means taking one less vacation, not dining out, or skipping out on some entertainment- the responsibility is important and priceless. Although I consider myself more modern Orthodox, many of my cousins wear tzitzis and a black hat everywhere, everyday; to some cousins with farther Jewish affiliation all purchased policies. I am a bit more reassured that if something were to happen, the family would be financially taken care of, and there would be no need for a $300k, $500k, $1m+ campaign, which ultimately potentially redistributes away valued tzedaka from other needy causes such as Tomchei Shabbos, shul building projects, yeshiva scholarships. We all honored our grandfather, and may none of us have to ever use the policy.
I don’t know what goes on in your private lives or homes regarding various forms of insurance. I try not to judge or look down at campaigns where someones house was burned down, and the community discovered after that the family didn’t have house-insurance because of a “religious belief”, for a $750k campaign. Or the campaign for a new car for someone without car insurance. Although I opine differently than you with this particular campaign (and will not be contributing), I certainly encourage everyone to contribute and donate what/if feels right and what they are able to contribute. I am open to fair and differing dialogue, and I’d like to see more of it regarding this question and topic. May we never have to use any of our policies (excluding hospital bills for a baby delivery BH). Just as important, I hope my message resonates with at least one person here.
It’s an explicit teshuva in Igros Moshe Orach Chaim Chalek Beis Siman 111 that getting life insurance is not at all prohibited and in fact a good idea.
IMO, anyone with children must have life insurance, and you’re just negligent if you don’t get it. Ask your Rabbanim, and they will tell you the same thing. Even if you have health problems like diabetes, there are simplified issue term products (no medical exam), for example, that you can get.
I am not implying in any way that people shouldn’t donate to this family, but it is just a fact that there is no way to raise anywhere near the $500,000 dollars that a $30/month life insurance policy would pay. Hashem yiracheim.
Thanks for sourcing. My female cousin’s halachic husband (she is waiting for her Get for 10+ years, R’L’) always refused life insurance because he said it isn’t halachically allowed. Was told it was some type of superstition or something of the like- even with having 4 children. Even if he wasn’t horribly withholding a Get, an individual with such an attitude towards lack of responsibility would prove a challenge and uphill hurdle for me to want to help. Understandably, it’s important and worthy to help out the wife and children.
He is smart for not having life insurance … because if he did after holding back a get for 10+ years he would have been knocked off and it would have been a double win
Jack, I thought of that before. But, the owner of the policy can cancel for whatever reason at any point.
I have no idea if he had insurance (and neither do you) but let’s say hypothetically he didn’t and was negligent, that’s a reason to punish his wife and kids??? What did they do wrong?
You wanna teach a lesson to all future people that they better buy insurance or their kids will suffer like these?? That takes quite a bit of nerve to take that on your shoulders…
Dave, negligence is very different than trying to attain a policy and not being able to because of medical history or financial strains. I never suggested punishing wives and children. By all means, Mr Rhodes was a special and precious person. Perhaps stronger emphasis in kollels, marriage classes, etc. Sometimes it takes a little nerve to move something beneficial across (look at some shuls not refusing to let antivaxxers in their building)
While I hear what you’re saying, and certainly agree about the importance of insurance, there’s one thing you’re very wrong about, and that is the idea that by donating to this campaign it is taking away from more important organizations.
Money is in the hands of Hakadosh Baruch Hu, and He is the One who decides which organization gets what. The idea that having these campaigns in any way takes away from other organizations I would venture to say is apikorsus. It is mentioned again and again throughout Tanach that all the money and gold and silver and everything else in this world belongs to H-shem. It does not belong to mankind. The fact that H-shem gives wealth to some people, and poverty to others, does not mean that He cannot give wealth to all. And the wealthy person who has money, while he may feel it is his money, it does not belong to him. H-shem gave it to him, and in a moment can just as easily take it away from him.
Donating to one cause does not take away from another one. It says straight out in the Torah that H-shem is the Father of orphans, and takes care of the widows. If you don’t donate, someone else will, and just because someone else donated will not cause Tomchei Shabbos or Chai Lifeline or other organizations to be lacking in funds. H-shem has an infinite amount of ways of getting money to people and providing them with their needs, and He has an infinitely equal amount of ways of getting money to all these various chesed organizations.
Don’t think for even one moment that someone else will be “lacking” because someone chose to give to another cause. H-shem takes care of all of His children, and your donating or not donating will not make it less possible for H-shem to provide.
Whatever your principles or policies are, does not make a difference. Donating to this cause means you’re acting as H-shem’s shaliach to provide for his children’s needs. Being tight-fisted because now there’s another cause to donate to that could have/should have but wasn’t avoided is saying “H-shem, I’m smarter than You, and I know better than You how to take care of Klal Yisrael, and I have more mercy than You because I want to teach people a lesson, while You only give even when people are being (according to you, since you actually DON’T know the full story or anything else) irresponsible.”
Which in reality is just a way to absolve oneself from donating. A person never loses out by giving tzeddakah. If anything, they only gain. This fallacious excuse holds no ground.
If you really cared about this matter, you would invest your time into spreading awareness of this issue and bringing it to the attention of rabbanim and striving to help make a change in Klal Yisrael. The fact that you’re refusing to give in a time of need, and posting that kind of a message of “I’m not giving because I’m a more responsible person” which might have the negative effect of causing others not to donate either, is a lot worst than had you kept quiet and just didn’t donate, or if you would have donated, and posted the same message.
Maybe start learning Chovos Halevavos Shaar HaBitachon.
I for one, am appalled by your callous and self-righteous comment.
The Torah mentions the obligation to support widows and orphans many times. How many times does it mention life insurance?
P.s. I have life insurance too, but I know that paying those premiums isn’t going to get me access to Olam Haba half as much as paying the same amount each month (or even half of it) to supporting a worthy cause like this.
@AsherO Well said (And I have life insurance too)
It’s an explicit teshuva in Igros Moshe Orach Chaim Chalek Beis Siman 111 that getting life insurance is not at all prohibited and in fact a good idea.
Asher, I don’t appreciate the insults. I never said not to support widows and orphans. The Torah doesn’t point out using a computer to find airfare deals either or the rules of driving an automobile either (no sarcasm intended). The Torah doesn’t directly mention about Channuka either (strictly Rabbinic). What I’m trying to say is, we can’t compare the lives of 300 years ago to today. Did you know that income tax wasn’t around in the United States in the 1800’s? The government saw a need for additional income for goods and services for this nation. Life Insurance and my college degree isn’t getting me olam habah either, it’s just some responsible steps to take in this temporary world.
Donated! Such a worthy cause.
@tgi shabbos. While I agree with you in principle and agree life insurance is a must, we still must feel the pain of his wife and kids and donate something if your financially able too. You never know a reason why someone may not have life insurance. Eg financially strapped, underling medical issue, all that you will never know about. Be a good man and donate something if you can.
True, valid points.
Was by the shiva last night. What a special family. The strength that they have to see the enormous hashgacha in Naftali’s life was more inspiring than can be imagined. If this campaign just informed people of the potential they have by learning from him then it was worth it just from that. May his neshama have an aliyah and may he his family have a true nechama!
Just Donated. The family should not know of any more t’zaros.
Why is this tax deductible?
“Organization Legal Name
Yeshiva of Far Rockaway
EIN Number: 11-2205623
Yeshiva Far Rockaway is a non-profit 501c3 organization.”
I could be mistaken, I believe he was in the kollel there? Or taught there? Rabbi Bender (the head of that yeshiva) is remarkable in every way possible.
Nobody should ever be in this family’s situation. Nevertheless people should try to have life insurance. One should also be aware that those that work and pay into social security also get benefits for the children, Our government does not leave families to collapse.
Great point. SS+ personal retirement contributions if possible. Believe me, I WISH I could keep that extra 8% of my salary and use it today for many of the airfare deals on Dansdeals, but priorities are priorities. I’ll see what Black Friday has in store.
Done. Thank you for posting this.
BD”E. I spent last Shabbos in Cedarhurst and walked to Far Rockaway Shabbos morning – right across that same highway. Someone told me what had happened, but when he said ‘he fell in the street and a truck hit him,’ it never occurred to me that the victim was someone so young. Hashem Yerachem.
I was in yeshiva around there for many years. That street requires full and complete concentration and attention to carefully cross. On shabbos I was unable to press the crosswalk button, so even more dangerous on shabbos. Maybe engineers can hopefully plan a better strategy.
@tgishabbos I read your comment and couldn’t believe that a religious jew could have such a reaction and mindset towards such a tragic situation where at this point no one cares whether naftali had life insurance or not and if we are in a financial position to do so we are donating not making a family suffer and hoping to change 1 person and the fact that you treated the situation guilty until proven innocent by stating no donation until it is proven that he had life insurance shows such a heartless person and I think before you try changing the world with life insurance ideas change yourself
Anonymous, 1. why can’t you believe that a responsible religious Jew (or responsible gentile for that matter) has the mindset of financial reassurance for the family during such a tragic situation, as well as recommending you, I, and others out there for planning? 2. I never said anyone was guilty, I asked a question if the family has policies in place. There is no ‘guilt’ or ‘innocence’ when it comes to a tragedy like this- It’s always a devastating loss. To me, I’d feel heartless if I didn’t share with my friends the importance of life, health, and auto insurance. 3. I never discouraged others or said ‘No donation” for others. With my limited budget at this point in my life, I give tzedaka to a various rounds of organizations. I think it’s very fair to find out a little more about it. If you were to kindly and respectfully ask certain questions about the Tomchei Shabbos in your community, it’s fully acceptable for them to share some of the remarkable benefits of the organization and how it positively impacts others. At times I’ve give a little more if I were able to, when an organization illustrates the beauty of their services to the ones in our community needing a bit of a lift.
Three thoughts on this whole train of comments:
– I hope that people will help this family – whether or not he has life insurance.
– To TGI Shabbos’ point this should be a reminder to people to get life insurance, as well as a will.
A little story for you. My mother was nifteres about 9 years ago. While we were sitting shiva, a family friend who lost both of his parents in close succession told me about the difficulties he had when his mother had passed away (his father died first) because of her not having a will, giving him access to appropriate accounts, guardianship over younger siblings, etc. It scared me so much, that almost immediately after shiva, I made my dad put his will together. My father was niftar 15 months after my mother, 1 year to the day after signing his will.
EVEN WITH THE WILL, and guardianship, it still took a few months to get things settled. But it enabled us access to money, and enabled me to have my health insurance cover a younger brother.
I say this, especially to younger people who think death is so far away, and knowing that not everyone reading this might be able to afford it – but you need to have a what-if plan in place, g-d forbid something like this happens.
As a lighter P.S. – I saw one commenter below writing the word Hashem as H-shem. I think you may be unaware about what the word Hashem means. Hashem is a replacement for an un-erasable name of G-d, it literally means ‘the name’. If someone told you to write it this way, you may want to reconsider it.
I know of MANY halachic problematic situations that occurred without designing a Will according to halachic policies for an observant Jew. I’ve seen on the Chabad website discussing this. Because we reside in the USA, without a Will, often the medical rules may conflict with Torah values unfortunately. Your mother’s neshama should have an aliyah.
I think you’re referring to the medical ‘living’ will, also known as a health care proxy. Definitely something we did with both of my parents before they died – this gives a family member the rights to make medical decisions on behalf of the patient in case the patient is unconscious, or unable to make those decisions. Definitely a necessity for everyone, yet alone shomer torah individuals – it’s difficult to consult a rav in a life and death situation if you legally don’t have the power to take any action.
I’m fully aware that H-shem means The Name. I write it with a hyphen for the same reason I write the word G-d with a hyphen. I don’t feel comfortable writing out the full word since it is still a name that is used for He Who is One. And I know that typing isn’t considered a k’siv kayama and it can be erased etc. idk. I’ve been doing it for so long that it would be hard to stop. My apologies if it bothers you though.